Okay, so I’ve been into trying new things and personal growth lately. I’ve decided to do something radically different and actually post a happy blog. It won’t be as entertaining as my usual bitter-ray-of-sunshine revelations, but happiness is a new existence for me. (Also supports my theory that the best albums are those written by heartbroken musicians). Don’t worry, I will still continue my usual writings, but a few rays of genuine sunshine may poke through occasionally. Ever hear the expression “the only way to go from here is up?” Well I’ve been in “the only place to go from here is happy.” This is my naked portrayal of the process. To my muse: I promised I would post this, here you are. Thank you.
Signs Things Are Getting Better
Daydreaming becomes not having to create dreams but just reliving the previous day.
Music again holds a strong meaning. Not as a way to survive, but a way to celebrate.
Before I felt like I couldn’t breathe, now I bask in delicious gulps of air-so much I feel lightheaded.
Instead of the nagging thoughts keeping me up, it’s excitement, laughter, and good times.
Instead of numbly floating through the day, everything warrants appreciation and has meaning.
Every day is a celebration.
I wonder why my face hurts and I realize it’s because I’ve been smiling all day.
My friends and family no longer worry if I don’t immediately answer calls and emails-they now see it as a good sign.
I look forward to going home, putting the Ipod on, and daydreaming.
Love songs no longer cause abuse to my radio.
I’ve become a bit of a restless daredevil-wanting to see all aspects of life and take risks.
My long lost friend Sleep made a reappearance.
Now that I can sleep, I don’t want to miss a second of being awake.
Restlessness is a curse. Why sit still when you can go out and live?
I can now get fully dressed and ready (in nice clothes, not yoga pants) in 30 minutes...if another person wants to see me.
I haven’t worn yoga pants regularly in a month.
Heaters are no longer necessary. ;-)
It’s harder and harder to get out of bed in the morning but for good reasons.
Bridal commercials no longer cause two days of resentment and a need of yoga. Instead they inspire a kind of morbid curiosity.
When my friends get married, instead of feeling worried or sorry for them, I’m genuinely happy for them.
When I can stand to let people in enough to know what city I live in.
Throwing caution to the wind.
When I break all my regular habits...on my own.
People continuously say that I’m glowing and I wonder if I’ve turned into a glowworm.
Everything is like the first time, and I can remember the thrills before the lessons learned.
I once again toy with the idea that things could work out someday. Even for me.
I don’t have to meticulously plan the future because I am happy with today.
I actually genuinely smile and laugh out loud.
I don’t have to fake happiness.
I’m ready to take on the world again.
I feel alive. I am alive.
