Common Dating Mistakes...Urgh

I always smile at websites or magazines that offer dating advice because I always believe they are commonsense issues that surely every adult person knows. Apparently not. So here is Tabby’s list of dating blunders.

1. Overly possessive.
Ok, it’s cute that you are excited to be with us but we are not property. You can’t brand us like cattle. If we are with you, we obviously want to be. There’s no need to call every five minutes, leave ten messages, and resort to extreme PDA and chest pounding in public. In simple terms: creepy, possessive, smothering, and jealousy bad!!

2. Oooh, you’re so scary
I get it, muscles and testosterone. There’s no need to start unnecessary fights, puff your chest out and walk with a swagger. It just makes me think of a gorilla. And am I attracted to gorillas? No.

3. No follow through
This one is very simple. When you say you’re going to do something, do it. This is one of the most common mistakes.

4. Expecting her to act like your mother
Some people are just nurturing creatures. Many will take advantage of that kindness, especially with cohabitation. I am not a mommy replacement so make your own damn sandwich.

5. Friends dictate your life
Your bros, wingmen, buddies, etc are important to you. I get it. But do they need to run your life? They are not relationship experts and most of them probably have never had one. Make your own decisions like you have a brain.

6. The threat of success
The best way to test a man’s commitment isn’t to gauge his reaction during a traumatic event. Check his reaction in the face of success. Anyone can deliver ice cream and make French fries, but many men feel threatened by his girlfriend’s success. Just because you’re a loser doesn’t mean I have to be.

7. Hypocritical standards
Adhere to your standards. What is okay for you should be okay for the other person. And remember what standards you set, because I will.

8. Not having your own life
Scientifically speaking, in the first six months of dating, dopamine and serotonin levels peak, creating a form of obsession with your significant other. Once you transition out of this phase, you feel attached to your partner deeply, but often begin pursuing interests that have fallen by the wayside. Just don't forget the step where you start persuing those other interests. Nobody likes a needy person or needs seran wrap.

14. Constantly bringing up the ex-factor
Talking about an ex a lot, regardless if positive or negative, sends the message the person is not over him/her. And unless you are looking to start WWIII, bringing up an ex in an argument as ammo is a very bad idea.

15. Treating others poorly
When dating, being rude to another person is a huge red flag. It isn’t impressive; I just think you’re a narcissistic psycho.

16. Inflated ego: Superman complex
While Superman may seem impressive, you are not him. When bragging about a big game or conquest, I wonder what he’s compensating for. When men get it into their heads they are an all important king, I get the strongest urge to prove otherwise.

17. Talk to me, not at me
When speaking, have a conversation. Don’t verbally kidnap the other person. They are an intelligent person and can understand verbal communication. Don’t talk to me like I’m five.

Lastly, stop enabling! They do this because we put up with it! If they couldn’t get a date, maybe, just maybe, that would make them question themselves.

Thank you.